Korean transgender livestreamer “kkotja (꽃자, Flower Woman)” revealed on one of her broadcasts, the details of how and why she went through orchiectomy, or the removal of both testicles as part of sex reassignment surgery.
Kkotja decided to undergo orchiectomy mainly because no matter how much plastic surgery she received to feminize her facial features, she felt she had “masculine traits” remaining.
At the time, she could not afford a full removal of all the male parts, nor did she feel the urgency to go through such a big surgery, so she elected to get an orchiectomy instead.
She explained that in order to receive the orchiectomy, she needed a diagnosis from a psychiatrist that outlined the need for her to receive the surgery. Kkotja then recounted her visit to the psychiatrist.
“The hospital where I was scheduled to receive the orchiectomy said I must bring in a statement from a psychiatrist saying that this procedure is necessary for me. So I went to see a psychiatrist, who had me answer around 500 questions that hinted at my orientation and sexual identity.” — kkotja
Kkotja’s evaluation came out 50% male and 50% female. When the psychiatrist refused to issue the statement, she disputed the validity of the survey by pointing out that some of the questions were unreasonable and unrelated to determining a person’s sex.
“I remember two of the questions very clearly. They asked if I like flowers and if I plan on becoming a florist. I answered no to both because I don’t like flowers. I asked the psychiatrist if girls aren’t allowed to dislike flowers. Had I answered yes to one of those two questions, the result would have changed and said I was female. So, in order for me to be female, I have to like flowers? If I don’t plan on becoming a florist, I can’t be female? That’s ridiculous. I fought the psychiatrist on this point until I was issued the statement.” — kkotja
With the statement in hand, kkotja successfully received orchiectomy. She remembered lying on the surgical bed but nothing else. “It was done and over with by the time I woke up.”
Kkotja discussed the long and painful recovery that followed her surgery. She explained that immediately after the surgery, she felt no pain and could walk around without difficulty. As soon as the anesthesia wore off, however, she recalled suffering tremendously.
“I couldn’t move. The pain was so intense. I crawled home and passed out on my back, but the pain was so bad that I couldn’t do anything. It was as if someone had grabbed the testicles and ripped them out. Can you imagine that?” — kkotja
She also shared an episode of her cats nearly killing her during her recovery time. She said she can now laugh about everything that has happened but, at the time, she was miserable and in pain.
“I was resting with my legs up and open. My cats were playing around with each other when one of them came up to me and literally clawed right down the stitch line. I nearly died of shock. I had to ask a close friend of mine to take the cats for a while.” — kkotja
Kkotja also talked about an additional plastic surgery on her lips to change the shape and the angles of the corners of her lips. This procedure was also unspeakably painful, kkotja described.
“Personally, I think the lip surgery hurt way more than the face shaping surgery. It felt like a thousand needles poking at my face.” — kkotja
In another video on her livestream channel, kkotja explained in depth why she decided to go through such painful procedures to transform her sex. Even before she began the process of transitioning, when she simply appeared as a gay man, she believed it was natural for her to like men.
“I have never in my life thought that I’m ‘supposed to’ like girls. I have always been more attracted to men… I used to be so ugly. Before I received any procedure, I looked completely male. So it also made dating other guys in public difficult. As I began hanging out with other transgender women, I began to realize I wanted to look like them and be fully female like them… My father promised he wouldn’t stop me from undergoing sex reassignment surgery if I still ‘felt gay’ after completing military duty. He thought the military duty would ‘man me up’. So, I joined the army. As soon as I got out, I was on the surgery bed.” — kkotja
Kkotja is an avid broadcast jockey, with over 80K subscribers and regular content uploads. In most videos, she openly discusses her journey as a transgender woman in Korea and shares past experiences for viewers to watch and understand.
Watch the full video here: